happy christmas sandra

growing up, we celebrated christmas big. it was a 3 week preparation for a feast, with lighted trees, candy making and parties lots of baking gifts...all building to santa, presents and the feast.
there was no church. there was no mention of jesus.it was a winter festival, a self indulgent dream, a big party to celebrate making it through another year.
its lost something for me.
sure i love the gift giving part. and i love being able to buy great gifts for the people i love. the food has changed. since i can no longer eat like everyone else, nor does samantha. and having to consider everyones dietetic restrictions... is exhausting.
but the real issue is the loneliness.
if youve no one in your life, it just adds more weight.
the only thing worse i think, is being separated from the one you love during the holidays.
because when there is no one to talk to
your thoughts can drive you mad.
merry christmas. cheers