i went through a patch where i ripped up every painting i did, began.,. etc.
this weekend i did 2, something familiar.
one i finished,
the other is soon finished, just adding depth now, perhaps some greenery.
i had no libido either, im wondering if its on the same cycle as the chemo,
because i remember this happening before. i'll see.
my crazy son arrives tomorrow, its been over a year.
he samantha and i fly out tuesday morning
headed for honolulu for 7 days.
the addams family does oahu, all in black i bet!
i actually wear the black for extra protection,
they wear it for their own reasons.
its true, a darker color blocks more uv rays. cacky 3, black 7.
my skin has an almost allergic reaction to the sun,
it breaks the blood vessels. (thank you liver disease)
so i will be as covered as i can and still get wet.
my personal mission is to fly my mini dragonfly kite on the beach.
and to snorkel, and hope i have the energy to keep up with these 2.
they will not let me rest on the rails,
theyre gonna take me off trail, down a canyon and under the falls.
one pulling and one pushing from the other side saying,
"you can do this mom"
they make me look good. repeatedly.
i cant wait for a break. its been too long.
ive spent too much time waiting and not enough time living.
i know i have cancer,
but i also know im not gonna cure it with heartache and laying on the couch.
what a great place to get a new perspective.
my laast trip to oahu saved my soul.
its time to change.
i cant thik of a better place to sort things out.
sigh
