alone i keep the wolves at bay

i feel scattered, unfocused and pensive. i dont know if its my raging pausal moans (perimenopausal hormones)but i feel terribly nostalgic. im trying to recount and remember in a way i never have before. generally i am not a person who looks back.
perhaps i just realize that im not bloody immortal. because i dont really feel old. i just feel like ive been here a long time.

couple of images